Dita Von Teese Was Right

About everything, including capri pants.

I had a rockabilly phase in my late teens that somehow extended well into my early twenties. If you don’t know what that means, imagine spending hours trying to master victory curls (which are much harder than pin-up models make them look), exclusively wearing high-waisted skirts and pants, and applying a bold blue-red lipstick regardless of the time, place, or occasion. Basically, I was committed to looking like a 1950s sexpot at all times.

Baby Belle in victory rolls.

I can’t exactly pinpoint what sparked my fascination with the era, although I’m pretty sure it began with my love affair with Christian Dior’s 1947 New Look. The nipped-in waist, the dramatic full skirt, it felt like the ultimate expression of glamour, sex appeal, and sophistication. I was bewitched.

My gateway drug to vintage fashion in the mainstream was burlesque icon Dita Von Teese. Back in the early 2000s, vintage fashion wasn’t the competitive blood sport it is today. Nobody was fighting me for a cashmere cardigan from the 1950s, and my friends were deeply confused by my insistence on wearing a vintage corset to the club. (Yes, really). While everyone else was dressing for a night out, I was apparently dressing for a postwar martini party.

Baby Belle in vintage 50s .🩷

Either way, Dita left a lasting impression on my young mind.

While sitting in a very fancy nail salon in Midtown, I did what many other women do and asked for gel extensions in an almond shape. As I settled into the chair, I had a vague flashback to Dita Von Teese’s book, where she mentioned that she only wears almond-shaped nails.

Through thick and thin, I have worn almond-shaped nails for the last fifteen years. Although, to be fair, when I first started spending my hard-earned money on acrylics, I did briefly try square-tipped French manicures. At the time, I was working at Chuck E. Cheese, which was already a fairly chaotic chapter of my life, so naturally I thought adding early-2000s acrylics to the mix was a good idea.

They never really suited me. The French manicure felt like I was playing a character. Almond-shaped nails, on the other hand, felt glamorous. They made even the most mundane activities feel slightly more elegant, whether I was typing an email or handing a parent a stack of prize tickets while dressed as an employee of a children’s pizza empire.

Fifteen years later, not much has changed. The nails are still almond-shaped, and Dita, once again, appears to have been right.

“You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there's still going to be somebody who hates peaches." — Dita Von Teese

Sitting pretty waiting for my perfect fingertips to form, also reminded me of an image of Dita that I’m not really sure it came from her book or a paparazzi photo of her wearing a Capri pants to either yoga or Pilates. That’s right the queen of burlesque were a Capri pants in the 2010s. Personally, I feel like a Capri can be really cute. I don’t actually feel like it is a random trend. I think it’s more of a classic style that we’re just now referencing again. Akin to a pedal pusher, a capri is just a cropped pant. And before 2010, I would dare to say most if not almost all women had a variation of this.

Go ahead and try these from Reformation for $128…they were good enough for Dita!

Oh, and of course Dita introduced me to some of my all-time favorite designers: the incredible and unforgettable Catherine D’Lish and the highly sought-after Zac Posen.

In fact, I saved up $500 from my assisting jobs to buy a custom Catherine D’Lish robe in bubblegum pink, complete with rows and rows of marabou feathers. To this day, it remains one of the most ridiculous and fabulous purchases I’ve ever made. Some people save for a car. I saved for a robe that shed feathers all over my apartment.

2016 in Catherine D’Lish

Shockingly, even with trends coming and going, and after thinking about all the people who have influenced my personal style over the years, I’m pretty thrilled to say that her style philosophy has actually stuck. I still love a high waist, even though I’m no longer attempting victory curls. I’ve opted to embrace my natural curls instead, but a red lip is still something I fancy. The allure of an almond-shaped nail remains strong, and of course, there are Louboutins, which I now own far more pairs of than my younger self could have ever imagined.

Sadly, Zac Posen shuttered his namesake label, but that hasn’t stopped me from collecting his pieces whenever I find them. At this point, I’ll happily buy just about anything he’s touched, including his current work for Gap. Some people collect art. I collect evidence of Zac Posen’s continued existence in fashion.

My best friend Christine Buzan also got married recently, and one of her wedding photos immediately reminded me of an infamous image of Dita with her ex-husband Marilyn Manson. I’ll leave the photos here because the resemblance is impossible to ignore, and because both sets of images are wonderfully extravagant in the best possible way.

So yes, in case you were wondering, I’m pretty sure Dita was right about everything- including Capri pants. At the very least, she was right about waistlines, lingerie, glamour, and the transformative power of a good red lipstick. The only mystery that remains is her perfume. I am absolutely dying to know what she wears.

Photo by Afterglow of Christine Buzan

Dita Von Teese in Vivienne Westwood for Vogue in March, 2006.